Ever wonder how getting married changes the dynamics of a relationship? Just get engaged and start planning a wedding - I think that is close enough!!! I tell ya, for a guy who said - just plan it and I'll show up regarding his wedding (mind you this was pre-engagement) he sure has a lot of opinions and has been very involved! Now, don't get me wrong - I love it! I love the fact that he wants the day to be perfect too - I just wish his idea of perfect and my idea of perfect were one in the same. LOL There are things that he really cares about that I don't. Likewise there are things that I very much care about that really don't matter to him. But I guess if it weren't that way he would be my best gal pal instead of my fiancé. Amen?
So, along with the wedding bells and typical sugar and spice and everything nice girly stuff... there's also the snips and snails and puppy dog tails. I'm just so happy to be marrying such a wonderful, loving, and attentive man. I often wonder if anyone is as lucky as me? So... anyone else lucky enough to marry a man that tells her she is beautiful every day? One that shares in rejoicing over the blessing that God seems to pouring over us daily? One that will stand behind her 100% on any decision?
Does it get any better? OK Lord - I'm waiting expectantly... sooooo.... does it??? :-)
Being that KK is going in for surgery at 7:15 in the morning I guess I should be getting off here and heading to bed. Keep us in your prayers! I think this is probably going to be a little harder on mommy than it is on KK. I'll keep everyone posted. Thanks for all your love and concern!
God bless,
The Future Mrs JD
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Meatloaf, mashed potatoes and a Happy New Year
So tonight I was queen of the kitchen... meatloaf, mashed potatos (the homemade kind - NOT instant), brussel sprouts (yes, JD and I both love them!), the whole shebang. Not too bad considering I have never made meatloaf or fixed homemade mashed potatos before! Actually, it was quite delish! It was a reminder of how good it feels to be in sync... to prepare a whole meal like that with perfect timing - it takes talent. To be honest - I'm quite out of practice in the kitchen... but I'm hoping to change that now that I have my own home.
It's quite unbelievable that we are getting ready to ring in a new year. This will be the first in I'm not sure how long that I won't be single. I'm happy to be looking forward to 2007 with one of the most incredible men I know! It's really been an amazing few months leading up to now and I'm so thankful to have had JD around to be a part of it all - it wouldn't have been near as special or amazing without him.
I don't feel I'm on my game as far as writing goes tonight... but it's been a while and I felt like writing a blog before getting to work on some laundry. It's the procrastinator in me I guess. At any rate... my first Christmas in my own home was magical. The minimalist Christmas tree was beautiful... even when KK undecorated it constantly. Of course the laundry piled up a bit and the weight too, lol... but we enjoyed time with family and eating - and that is what matters.
So - into the next year I will carry some of that first Christmas in you own home magic with me... and at the end of January I will get to add some Disney magic to it... totally excited to be taking KK on her first trip to Disney! She is going to have a blast! Along with the magic I will carry a hope in my heart for what is to come - things that I cannot know or see... but things that have been promised long before I was ever born. It is so wonderful to see The Masters hands at work... and I'm excited to see the tapestry he is weaving for this next year in my life. He has my best in mind (Jeremiah 29:11)... he has me hemmed in before and behind (Psalm 139)... so I know that whatever it is, it is good.
I'm certain that no matter what 2007 may bring that my love will be with me... he has hung in there through thick and thin... and now has made it through several family functions (I'm extremely impressed - as is the rest of the family). There are talks in the grapevine of wedding bells that neither JD nor I were ringing... so we are unsure at this point if an eccentric family member has made mention of some sort of vision, or if we are really putting off those types of vibes, lol. Either way... we are happy to know that everyone wishes us well and strongly approves. That's a first for me!
I did ask JD if he would marry me for my meatloaf and mashed potatos. He quickly replied that he would marry me for my banana pudding... and everything else is just gravy. Guess it's true - the way to a man's heart is through his stomach! LOL
That's all for now - I'll make sure I keep everyone updated. Have a safe and Happy New Year!
May God bless you with all the best in 2007.
LF
It's quite unbelievable that we are getting ready to ring in a new year. This will be the first in I'm not sure how long that I won't be single. I'm happy to be looking forward to 2007 with one of the most incredible men I know! It's really been an amazing few months leading up to now and I'm so thankful to have had JD around to be a part of it all - it wouldn't have been near as special or amazing without him.
I don't feel I'm on my game as far as writing goes tonight... but it's been a while and I felt like writing a blog before getting to work on some laundry. It's the procrastinator in me I guess. At any rate... my first Christmas in my own home was magical. The minimalist Christmas tree was beautiful... even when KK undecorated it constantly. Of course the laundry piled up a bit and the weight too, lol... but we enjoyed time with family and eating - and that is what matters.
So - into the next year I will carry some of that first Christmas in you own home magic with me... and at the end of January I will get to add some Disney magic to it... totally excited to be taking KK on her first trip to Disney! She is going to have a blast! Along with the magic I will carry a hope in my heart for what is to come - things that I cannot know or see... but things that have been promised long before I was ever born. It is so wonderful to see The Masters hands at work... and I'm excited to see the tapestry he is weaving for this next year in my life. He has my best in mind (Jeremiah 29:11)... he has me hemmed in before and behind (Psalm 139)... so I know that whatever it is, it is good.
I'm certain that no matter what 2007 may bring that my love will be with me... he has hung in there through thick and thin... and now has made it through several family functions (I'm extremely impressed - as is the rest of the family). There are talks in the grapevine of wedding bells that neither JD nor I were ringing... so we are unsure at this point if an eccentric family member has made mention of some sort of vision, or if we are really putting off those types of vibes, lol. Either way... we are happy to know that everyone wishes us well and strongly approves. That's a first for me!
I did ask JD if he would marry me for my meatloaf and mashed potatos. He quickly replied that he would marry me for my banana pudding... and everything else is just gravy. Guess it's true - the way to a man's heart is through his stomach! LOL
That's all for now - I'll make sure I keep everyone updated. Have a safe and Happy New Year!
May God bless you with all the best in 2007.
LF
Monday, November 27, 2006
My heart isn't in this blog
I can't seem to find the poetic words to express what I really want to say tonight. To say the least, my heart is just not into writing right now. However, be it said that I need to write this blog. My heart seems to be elsewhere as of late. Right now I think it's probably on it's way to Winn-Dixie. :-) I'm not being funny or cute... ok, well I am - but the point is that someone very special has taken my heart with him.
So on a night like tonight when I keep typing and backspacing and typing again... starting over several times, adding things in and taking stuff out - I can't seem to concentrate on how to say things or what to say or even how to put it all together with a nice big red bow on top... just for him... I figure I might as well say anything as opposed to nothing. And even if it's not terribly impressive to most - the one who counts will get what I mean. I realize that was a terrible run-on... and I don't care (for the record). With so many possibilities of what to say and where to go with all that is on my heart and mind... I can't possibly write a truly coherent masterpiece of a blog.
My typical cutseyness doesn't seem to be working for me tonight. I guess because being too cute would only diminish the sincerity of it all. Because, let me tell you... this man is beyond wonderful to me - and always has been. His shadow darkened my door long before the introduction of Jason... and our witty banter has outlasted the faint whispering stream of lies and broken promises that flowed from Jason's mouth. His words have always been sincere and true - and he tells me every day how beautiful he thinks I am.
I am overcome with gratefulness that the Lord has blessed me so greatly by placing him along my path. He has such a gracious servants heart. He has been strength for me not only physically but emotionally. He's been there for me when most other guys probably would have walked away in frustration. He never once said I told you so and gave me the opportunity to sort some things out for myself but was always willing to give an opinion when asked for it.
I can't imagine what my life would be like right now without JD. Well... for one I probably wouldn't have half of the things around this house accomplished - he has been such a huge help!
In other respects... I think I might feel a little tossed about... he's been an anchor for me.
In short... my heart may not be in this blog... but I know where to find it. Right now it seems that some guy with a really hot Monte Carlo has it. I just hope he is careful with it and keeps it all in one piece. :-)
Be blessed!
LF
So on a night like tonight when I keep typing and backspacing and typing again... starting over several times, adding things in and taking stuff out - I can't seem to concentrate on how to say things or what to say or even how to put it all together with a nice big red bow on top... just for him... I figure I might as well say anything as opposed to nothing. And even if it's not terribly impressive to most - the one who counts will get what I mean. I realize that was a terrible run-on... and I don't care (for the record). With so many possibilities of what to say and where to go with all that is on my heart and mind... I can't possibly write a truly coherent masterpiece of a blog.
My typical cutseyness doesn't seem to be working for me tonight. I guess because being too cute would only diminish the sincerity of it all. Because, let me tell you... this man is beyond wonderful to me - and always has been. His shadow darkened my door long before the introduction of Jason... and our witty banter has outlasted the faint whispering stream of lies and broken promises that flowed from Jason's mouth. His words have always been sincere and true - and he tells me every day how beautiful he thinks I am.
I am overcome with gratefulness that the Lord has blessed me so greatly by placing him along my path. He has such a gracious servants heart. He has been strength for me not only physically but emotionally. He's been there for me when most other guys probably would have walked away in frustration. He never once said I told you so and gave me the opportunity to sort some things out for myself but was always willing to give an opinion when asked for it.
I can't imagine what my life would be like right now without JD. Well... for one I probably wouldn't have half of the things around this house accomplished - he has been such a huge help!
In other respects... I think I might feel a little tossed about... he's been an anchor for me.
In short... my heart may not be in this blog... but I know where to find it. Right now it seems that some guy with a really hot Monte Carlo has it. I just hope he is careful with it and keeps it all in one piece. :-)
Be blessed!
LF
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Reality check!
Wow... it's really getting down to a little less talk and a lot more action. I bought some tuscan place mats and napkins for the kitchen and a beautiful framed print of some pottery... and a canvas that is going to perfect in my room. I can hardly believe it!
So, I've started some packing... minor things. I keep thinking... what else can I do because it seems so far away, but it's really creeping up on me quick. I've got 2 full weeks before the move. HOLY COW!!! Oh, and get this... I have to go to Atlanta on business the 7th - 9th... GREAT!!! So, bottom line is it is time to get a move on.
In other news... KK is still struggling with this allergy/sinus stuff and ended up with yet ANOTHER ear infection. Dr H is talking allergist or tubes in the ears if things don't turn around quick. The ear infection was so bad in one ear that her ear drum was bulging. Poor baby is having to get the round of 3 antibiotics shots every other day since the last 3 rounds of oral antibiotics didn't work. We are definitely ready for some reliefs, so I'm doing what it takes. But it hurts my heart to have to see her go through that.
Right now it seems that I am in a season in my life of change. Everything is changing and nothing is staying the same. Not only is my life changing, I am changing. I think that is a positive thing. New opportunities are opening up... new people are coming into my life... it's really exciting. Unfortunately, with the good is also the bad.
You never know who you can trust. I'm a very trusting and loyal person. I'm understanding and I'm empathic. While those are good traits it can open me up to some very harsh realities and heart ache if I open my life up to the wrong person. You always hope that isn't the case, but sometimes you never know until its too late. I am so grateful that in each and every instance I have had the Lord has taught me something and I have grown from it. In his infinite wisdom and sovereignty he is weaving such a beautiful tapestry from my life. On the underneath there are tangles and knots that form a network and grounding for the beautiful picture on the surface. So, instead of looking at each and every tangle individually as he is "weaving" the story of my life I choose to look at the bigger picture... the beautiful results of what he is doing.
It seems so odd at such a time in my life that is full of hustle and bustle that He would tell me wait in a particular area of my life... but He has. And althought I don't know what is ahead I am trusting Him and I am waiting. The proverbial sitting still is killing me when everything else seems to be zooming ahead in my life. I don't wanna wait!!! It's scary... thinking things might get behind... but I wait, because ultimately HE knows what is best... see I can't see what the Lord is orchestrating. I can't see what He is protecting me from or preparing me for, or how is he preparing someone else for whatever it is that is to come. Trust, faith, hope, honor... all things I am having to work at. Change is good!!!
God bless!
LF
So, I've started some packing... minor things. I keep thinking... what else can I do because it seems so far away, but it's really creeping up on me quick. I've got 2 full weeks before the move. HOLY COW!!! Oh, and get this... I have to go to Atlanta on business the 7th - 9th... GREAT!!! So, bottom line is it is time to get a move on.
In other news... KK is still struggling with this allergy/sinus stuff and ended up with yet ANOTHER ear infection. Dr H is talking allergist or tubes in the ears if things don't turn around quick. The ear infection was so bad in one ear that her ear drum was bulging. Poor baby is having to get the round of 3 antibiotics shots every other day since the last 3 rounds of oral antibiotics didn't work. We are definitely ready for some reliefs, so I'm doing what it takes. But it hurts my heart to have to see her go through that.
Right now it seems that I am in a season in my life of change. Everything is changing and nothing is staying the same. Not only is my life changing, I am changing. I think that is a positive thing. New opportunities are opening up... new people are coming into my life... it's really exciting. Unfortunately, with the good is also the bad.
You never know who you can trust. I'm a very trusting and loyal person. I'm understanding and I'm empathic. While those are good traits it can open me up to some very harsh realities and heart ache if I open my life up to the wrong person. You always hope that isn't the case, but sometimes you never know until its too late. I am so grateful that in each and every instance I have had the Lord has taught me something and I have grown from it. In his infinite wisdom and sovereignty he is weaving such a beautiful tapestry from my life. On the underneath there are tangles and knots that form a network and grounding for the beautiful picture on the surface. So, instead of looking at each and every tangle individually as he is "weaving" the story of my life I choose to look at the bigger picture... the beautiful results of what he is doing.
It seems so odd at such a time in my life that is full of hustle and bustle that He would tell me wait in a particular area of my life... but He has. And althought I don't know what is ahead I am trusting Him and I am waiting. The proverbial sitting still is killing me when everything else seems to be zooming ahead in my life. I don't wanna wait!!! It's scary... thinking things might get behind... but I wait, because ultimately HE knows what is best... see I can't see what the Lord is orchestrating. I can't see what He is protecting me from or preparing me for, or how is he preparing someone else for whatever it is that is to come. Trust, faith, hope, honor... all things I am having to work at. Change is good!!!
God bless!
LF
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Jesus take the wheel
I barely remember writing that last blog - it just seems like so long ago! I'm continually praising the Lord for all He has done. In the midst of the storm I've had to keep my eyes on Him. The giants I spoke about before were no the only giants I've had to face along the way. But, in His perfect timing it will all come together!
Just to update all you curious folks out there... tomorrow I will be meeting with my attorney to re-draft a contract with my offer... negotiating is not my strong suite... so I don't like this much. However, I feel that the Lord has given me a clear answer and that both parties are going to be very happy with this offer and the contract. Once I have that in line the appraisal and inspection will ensue... yay! Tentative closing date? Nov 17th. If I had it my way I wuld do it earlier... but I don't really want to pay interest for many more days that is absolutely necessary.
OK... so no one EVER told me what a pain in the buhunkuss it is to buy a house! Ya coulda warned me!!! But in the end it will all be well worth it!
In other news... as it was brought to my attention this evening by a certain special someone... I will now have my very own refrigerator in my very own house with a very special honey-do list on it for a certain special someone. :-) I told him it was all his fault because he volunteered himself. Now I just got to think of all the potential projects he can work on for me. Wow! Is that weird or what?! Who ever thought Miss Independent Me would have a honey-do list when I've always been of the mindset "I don't need your help!" Who is this man that has come in and upset my life! (I mean that in the sweetest most endearing way Jason).
Yeah... so, things are changing pretty fast. I'm purging... so right now I'm packing things up that I don't want or have room for for a yard sale. I'm making a list of things I need and things I have... and of course the dreaded 'project list' (a list of all the things I want to do to the house at some point). If you are reading this sweetheart - rest assured that some of those things will likely be added to the list of things you have already volunteered for. So, keep an eye on your honey-do list on the fridge... and bring your comfy tool belt, lol.
Work is crazy busy! We have yet to get another recruiter hired - and at this point it is really killing us. I have jury duty the week of 10/23... which I was recalled for from 6 months ago - and here we are again having to ask for me to be excused AGAIN! So... do I really need to be taking time off to close on the house and move? Probably not... but you know what, the Lord will work it all out - I can't sweat the small stuff.
I hope you all are blessed! I need to head to bed.
LF
Just to update all you curious folks out there... tomorrow I will be meeting with my attorney to re-draft a contract with my offer... negotiating is not my strong suite... so I don't like this much. However, I feel that the Lord has given me a clear answer and that both parties are going to be very happy with this offer and the contract. Once I have that in line the appraisal and inspection will ensue... yay! Tentative closing date? Nov 17th. If I had it my way I wuld do it earlier... but I don't really want to pay interest for many more days that is absolutely necessary.
OK... so no one EVER told me what a pain in the buhunkuss it is to buy a house! Ya coulda warned me!!! But in the end it will all be well worth it!
In other news... as it was brought to my attention this evening by a certain special someone... I will now have my very own refrigerator in my very own house with a very special honey-do list on it for a certain special someone. :-) I told him it was all his fault because he volunteered himself. Now I just got to think of all the potential projects he can work on for me. Wow! Is that weird or what?! Who ever thought Miss Independent Me would have a honey-do list when I've always been of the mindset "I don't need your help!" Who is this man that has come in and upset my life! (I mean that in the sweetest most endearing way Jason).
Yeah... so, things are changing pretty fast. I'm purging... so right now I'm packing things up that I don't want or have room for for a yard sale. I'm making a list of things I need and things I have... and of course the dreaded 'project list' (a list of all the things I want to do to the house at some point). If you are reading this sweetheart - rest assured that some of those things will likely be added to the list of things you have already volunteered for. So, keep an eye on your honey-do list on the fridge... and bring your comfy tool belt, lol.
Work is crazy busy! We have yet to get another recruiter hired - and at this point it is really killing us. I have jury duty the week of 10/23... which I was recalled for from 6 months ago - and here we are again having to ask for me to be excused AGAIN! So... do I really need to be taking time off to close on the house and move? Probably not... but you know what, the Lord will work it all out - I can't sweat the small stuff.
I hope you all are blessed! I need to head to bed.
LF
Monday, October 2, 2006
Stretching faith
OK, so it's been a while now and it's time for another blog. It is truly amazing the work God has done before my eyes in my own life and in the lives of others. We just went through ReFRESH (our annual 'revival' conference) at church and I am definitely refreshed! Through difficulties and busy-ness I made the time to go to the meetings and attend the lunches daily and the Lord truly blessed me for it! I am so grateful to be a part of a wonderful church full of loving people who are ready to serve our Lord and eachother.
Over the last month the Lord has really been stretching my faith. The area of finances has definitely been something he has been dealing with me with faith. It's not enough to give my little 10% each paycheck... it's not enough to give offerings above and beyond my tithe when I feel called to do so. It's not even enough to say that I know the Lord will provide. I must step out on faith and truly trust the Lord to provide for my every need. As the Lord revealed to me... worrying about my finances is a sure sign that I am not trusting him. Yeowch! That's a tough one!
I have had to focus and refocus on this one... I sometimes wonder how I am going to do things... but then I look at all he has given me. The resources I have are so far beyond what many others have. I am so blessed! I have discovered that he can do so much more with my not only my money but also my time... than I could ever dream of. So he says... "You say you believe I will provide for your needs... but are you trusting me, L??? Are you trusting me? Trust me! Trust me!" I am trusting in Him... I'm stepping out on His Word, as Peter did when he walked the water. And I know that even if I stumble, just as Peter did, my Lord and Savior will catch me. He will not let me sink!
I got a pop quiz on faith this week too. A recent development in my life is that I am buying a house. I had planned to wait until after the first of the year to begin looking again. For the last several months I have been working diligently to pay down debt to prepare for such an investment. Well, as you know, the Lord's timing is different from our own and he sure let me know that this week. He plunked an opportunity right on my lap in the form of a darling little 2 bed room home on the avenues. My mom decided to go out looking at a few of the homes a friend of ours told her about on thier street and 1 street up. While she was out she happened to run into this house - she called the number on the FSBY sign and talked to the owner and found out all about the house. She called me in tears... and shew asn't even sure why. When I looked at the home I fell in love. I spent the next rwo days wondering if it was the right thing... and praying. I took my bible out one evening and decided to read Deuteronomy rather than doing my normal devotions... when I opened up to chapter one I had no idea what I would read and what it would mean for me but I prayed to the Lord to show me His will and speak to me through His Word. He did alright. For those of you who know me and my situation you might understand this better... but here's the passages that really spoke to me.
Galations 1
6 The LORD our God said to us at Horeb, "You have stayed long enough at this mountain. 7 Break camp and advance into the hill country of the Amorites; go to all the neighboring peoples in the Arabah, in the mountains, in the western foothills, in the Negev and along the coast, to the land of the Canaanites and to Lebanon, as far as the great river, the Euphrates. 8 See, I have given you this land. Go in and take possession of the land that the LORD swore he would give to your fathers—to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob—and to their descendants after them." 9 At that time I said to you, "You are too heavy a burden for me to carry alone. 10 The LORD your God has increased your numbers so that today you are as many as the stars in the sky. 11 May the LORD, the God of your fathers, increase you a thousand times and bless you as he has promised!
30 The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, 31 and in the desert. There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place." 32 In spite of this, you did not trust in the LORD your God, 33 who went ahead of you on your journey, in fire by night and in a cloud by day, to search out places for you to camp and to show you the way you should go.
Woah! OK, so the Lord has promised me this home – that is basically what I got from that scripture. And he will go before me and fight… I just have to have… there's that word again… yep, FAITH! But of course giants came along as they did with Isreal that scared me… I felt like there was no way I could 'enter the land of Canaan' because of them. But I had to face the giants… oh wait, where have I heard that??? Oh "Facing the Giants"! Wow… he's really prepared me for this! I tell you, the Lord will never ask you to do anything he hasn't equipped you to do! Well, after beginning to stumble with doubt sure enough He was there to catch me… he gently reminded me that He can handle it if I will have faith and trust Him to instead of myself. Ladies and Gentleman… don't doubt in the dark what you have been shown in the light!
So, the short of it is that I am making an offer and putting down the earnest money this week… and I'm trusting God for the rest. He gave me a clear answer to my prayers and I can't let my flesh or Satan deceive me into thinking otherwise. Very soon KKand I will have our very own home! I am incredibly excited and we have already begun the planning. Pray for the decision to be made from here. Pray that I will be strong and be a good steward of this blessing… and pray for my family as we go through this transition. This is going to be very tough on Mimi and Papa! :-)
God bless!
LF
Over the last month the Lord has really been stretching my faith. The area of finances has definitely been something he has been dealing with me with faith. It's not enough to give my little 10% each paycheck... it's not enough to give offerings above and beyond my tithe when I feel called to do so. It's not even enough to say that I know the Lord will provide. I must step out on faith and truly trust the Lord to provide for my every need. As the Lord revealed to me... worrying about my finances is a sure sign that I am not trusting him. Yeowch! That's a tough one!
I have had to focus and refocus on this one... I sometimes wonder how I am going to do things... but then I look at all he has given me. The resources I have are so far beyond what many others have. I am so blessed! I have discovered that he can do so much more with my not only my money but also my time... than I could ever dream of. So he says... "You say you believe I will provide for your needs... but are you trusting me, L??? Are you trusting me? Trust me! Trust me!" I am trusting in Him... I'm stepping out on His Word, as Peter did when he walked the water. And I know that even if I stumble, just as Peter did, my Lord and Savior will catch me. He will not let me sink!
I got a pop quiz on faith this week too. A recent development in my life is that I am buying a house. I had planned to wait until after the first of the year to begin looking again. For the last several months I have been working diligently to pay down debt to prepare for such an investment. Well, as you know, the Lord's timing is different from our own and he sure let me know that this week. He plunked an opportunity right on my lap in the form of a darling little 2 bed room home on the avenues. My mom decided to go out looking at a few of the homes a friend of ours told her about on thier street and 1 street up. While she was out she happened to run into this house - she called the number on the FSBY sign and talked to the owner and found out all about the house. She called me in tears... and shew asn't even sure why. When I looked at the home I fell in love. I spent the next rwo days wondering if it was the right thing... and praying. I took my bible out one evening and decided to read Deuteronomy rather than doing my normal devotions... when I opened up to chapter one I had no idea what I would read and what it would mean for me but I prayed to the Lord to show me His will and speak to me through His Word. He did alright. For those of you who know me and my situation you might understand this better... but here's the passages that really spoke to me.
Galations 1
6 The LORD our God said to us at Horeb, "You have stayed long enough at this mountain. 7 Break camp and advance into the hill country of the Amorites; go to all the neighboring peoples in the Arabah, in the mountains, in the western foothills, in the Negev and along the coast, to the land of the Canaanites and to Lebanon, as far as the great river, the Euphrates. 8 See, I have given you this land. Go in and take possession of the land that the LORD swore he would give to your fathers—to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob—and to their descendants after them." 9 At that time I said to you, "You are too heavy a burden for me to carry alone. 10 The LORD your God has increased your numbers so that today you are as many as the stars in the sky. 11 May the LORD, the God of your fathers, increase you a thousand times and bless you as he has promised!
30 The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, 31 and in the desert. There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place." 32 In spite of this, you did not trust in the LORD your God, 33 who went ahead of you on your journey, in fire by night and in a cloud by day, to search out places for you to camp and to show you the way you should go.
Woah! OK, so the Lord has promised me this home – that is basically what I got from that scripture. And he will go before me and fight… I just have to have… there's that word again… yep, FAITH! But of course giants came along as they did with Isreal that scared me… I felt like there was no way I could 'enter the land of Canaan' because of them. But I had to face the giants… oh wait, where have I heard that??? Oh "Facing the Giants"! Wow… he's really prepared me for this! I tell you, the Lord will never ask you to do anything he hasn't equipped you to do! Well, after beginning to stumble with doubt sure enough He was there to catch me… he gently reminded me that He can handle it if I will have faith and trust Him to instead of myself. Ladies and Gentleman… don't doubt in the dark what you have been shown in the light!
So, the short of it is that I am making an offer and putting down the earnest money this week… and I'm trusting God for the rest. He gave me a clear answer to my prayers and I can't let my flesh or Satan deceive me into thinking otherwise. Very soon KKand I will have our very own home! I am incredibly excited and we have already begun the planning. Pray for the decision to be made from here. Pray that I will be strong and be a good steward of this blessing… and pray for my family as we go through this transition. This is going to be very tough on Mimi and Papa! :-)
God bless!
LF
Wednesday, September 6, 2006
More than most
I would have to say that in my life I have been through a lot of things that have given me the opportunity to learn hard but valuable lessons - more than most. By the grace of God I have come through all of those things not only physically alive but spiritually and emotionally. Rather than holding bitterness in my heart (well... for very long periods of time anyway) I have forgiven and moved on. I don't say these things to glorify myself. had it not been for the grace of God I believe I would be a very mean spirited, bitter, miserable person, but through his mercy and love he has given me the ability to walk in forgiveness daily.
Quite a bit of the things I have been through were inflicted by others... some were self inflicted, or at least partly. For those who know me, I mean really know me, you know my story and where I'm coming from on this. There are times in our lives when people wrong us, and at other times we are living in the consequences of our own sin... sometimes they are one in the same. I'm reminded of this on a daily basis.
So, in my "more than most" I have been given the opportunity to minister to many people who have been through similar circumstances. In return I am often blessed myself. Let it be said once again that what Satan means for harm God uses for good! In the midst of the storm it's hard to see the big picture, but not does he use those circumstance and those hurts to draw you closer to him and to shape adn mold you, but he also gives you area of ministry - an opportunity to share your faith and the love of Christ. Isn't that great? We must go thru the valleys to get to the mountain tops.
I really thought I was doing great in this area for a long time... I did hold it as a matter of pride. And sure as the sun rises I was blinded by my pride and I decieved myself into thinking that I deserved to hold onto some anger towards someone who hurt me very deeply. I'm being real here. I didn't want to let go of my anger and bitterness as if to say what this person did was ok. I went around telling myself that it was ok because I always did the right thing and spoke kindly despite the feelings in my heart... what a load of garbage! I carried around this anger that boiled up inside of me any time I thought about the person. I found myself again being prideful that I did the right thing even though this person didn't deserve it. It wasn't about doing the right thing because I had forgiven the person and let it go... it was like a tick mark to me of one more "good deed" stacked up against the all the things this person did to hurt me. That's a dangerous game.
Well, of course, as he often does, the Lord began speaking to me in themes... this one was on forgiveness. Oh how rotten! But Lord, can't I just hold on to this a little longer?! I have so much more to be angry about!!! Nope... no dice, he said. I had to take the high road. But on that road my burden has been much lighter. I gave all of the hurt over to him... and he is the defender and avenger of his people, so I can trust in him to bring everything to justice. Forgiveness is not something that happens over time, although time can sometimes dull the pain and make it easier to forgive. Forgiveness is a choice. It's a process you have to walk through... sometimes tiptoing.
I just thank my Heavenly Father that he chooses to forgive continually without condition because my Saviour, Jesus Christ, not only did more than most, loved more than most, and went thru more than most... he did more than any, loved more than any, and went thru more than any.
Quite a bit of the things I have been through were inflicted by others... some were self inflicted, or at least partly. For those who know me, I mean really know me, you know my story and where I'm coming from on this. There are times in our lives when people wrong us, and at other times we are living in the consequences of our own sin... sometimes they are one in the same. I'm reminded of this on a daily basis.
So, in my "more than most" I have been given the opportunity to minister to many people who have been through similar circumstances. In return I am often blessed myself. Let it be said once again that what Satan means for harm God uses for good! In the midst of the storm it's hard to see the big picture, but not does he use those circumstance and those hurts to draw you closer to him and to shape adn mold you, but he also gives you area of ministry - an opportunity to share your faith and the love of Christ. Isn't that great? We must go thru the valleys to get to the mountain tops.
I really thought I was doing great in this area for a long time... I did hold it as a matter of pride. And sure as the sun rises I was blinded by my pride and I decieved myself into thinking that I deserved to hold onto some anger towards someone who hurt me very deeply. I'm being real here. I didn't want to let go of my anger and bitterness as if to say what this person did was ok. I went around telling myself that it was ok because I always did the right thing and spoke kindly despite the feelings in my heart... what a load of garbage! I carried around this anger that boiled up inside of me any time I thought about the person. I found myself again being prideful that I did the right thing even though this person didn't deserve it. It wasn't about doing the right thing because I had forgiven the person and let it go... it was like a tick mark to me of one more "good deed" stacked up against the all the things this person did to hurt me. That's a dangerous game.
Well, of course, as he often does, the Lord began speaking to me in themes... this one was on forgiveness. Oh how rotten! But Lord, can't I just hold on to this a little longer?! I have so much more to be angry about!!! Nope... no dice, he said. I had to take the high road. But on that road my burden has been much lighter. I gave all of the hurt over to him... and he is the defender and avenger of his people, so I can trust in him to bring everything to justice. Forgiveness is not something that happens over time, although time can sometimes dull the pain and make it easier to forgive. Forgiveness is a choice. It's a process you have to walk through... sometimes tiptoing.
I just thank my Heavenly Father that he chooses to forgive continually without condition because my Saviour, Jesus Christ, not only did more than most, loved more than most, and went thru more than most... he did more than any, loved more than any, and went thru more than any.
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