Experiencing the loss of a loved on is a very personal and individual matter. In all my 26 years I have learned that each person grieves in thier own way. Some quietly, some not so quietly. But everyone needs thier time to grieve the loss of someone they've loved so much for so many years. Some grieve very privately and in the face of things are the strong rock that others need in order to get through. Some grieve very openly and need to lean hard on those around for comfort. The greatest thing I've seen is how a family pulls together to comfort and protect eachother in such a time of loss.
My Granddaddy passed away yesterday. It was a very hard loss for me but also very welcomed. It's hard to feel such relief and grief all at the same time. But I'm so thankful to have had him in my life for 26 years and even more thankful that he is no longer suffering and is in Heaven with our Lord. To know the depth of his love was the greatest gift ever... to be moved by his words in his last days was a comfort. You see, each Grandchild held a special place in Granddaddy's heart - and we all felt very close to him and very special in our own right. We each have a story to tell about the Granddaddy that we knew and loved.
For me, being the first Granddaughter, I was a little princess - doted over and very well taken care of. Granddaddy told the story many times over the years, and in his last days as well, of how he promised my Mom when she was pregnant with me a new air conditioning unit if she had a girl. We got the air conditioning unit and it was installed before I even came home from the hospital.
I will miss Granddaddy and his white haired wisdom. I'll think fondly and often about how he used to "beard" us. I'll forever be grateful that he left this earth knowing that I'm well taken care of by my husband - and he didn't have to ask anymore "Are you married yet?" I've been hearing that since my teen years! I'll say my daughter-to-be's name and think of him and the legacy that he has left for her to live up to. So many things to cherish that he left us all with. For now for every smile on my face there is a tear in my eye as I ponder the change in my life now that he is gone. Time will pass and seasons will change - and he will always be missed - but as my heart heals I'll be able to smile and have tears of joy rather than sadness whenever I think of Granddaddy.